Death Makes You Live Longer
It seems ironic that someone’s passing will make you understand the immediacy you must live your life with but it does so you can learn from the departed and live a better life for yourself
Death kills.
Of course, it does.
But when it does happen it usually is unexpected.
Because even though those that pass can be sick and you know they are going to pass away when it happens it’s different. It’s final.
They’re gone.
And when they pass away that’s it, you won’t see them again.
When someone dies it’s surreal.
If it’s a sudden death the first thing you and everyone that knows of them will say:
“How did they die?”
And it’s incredible how many times people ask this. It’s almost an automatic reaction to when someone goes that people bring up that question.
Even if they don’t know the person but they hear of the person’s passing they tend to ask this.
Why?
Because as human beings when we hear such a huge thing happening our survival instinct kicks in.
And with that, we seek knowledge.
Yet it makes perfect sense when you think about it.
Because we are here to survive. Our brains are wired for it. When on the evolutionary path throughout the millennia humans have always been on the watch out for danger.
As hunter-gatherers, we killed first and asked questions later.
But in the modern world when a death has occurred that questioning then begins.
Oddly though that’s not all I’ve learned from death in life. Instead, it’s what I’ve learned from the person who has passed. And unfortunately, the longer I live the more people I know who have gone to another place.
The more often this happens it also seems the more familiar you are with those that die or at least people that are related to them or are good friends or neighbors with them. You begin to see how close the grim reaper is to you.
And it makes you think.
Deeply.
You think deeper every time you hear of a death that is unexpected but at the same time, you don’t dwell on it.
Because one of the things you learn when another person dies is that your life is closer to the end. So you don’t think long about it. Rather you try to make the most of every day you have left.
But when a shocking death comes to your doorstep all you can do is try to learn.
Sure you`ll feel sorrow and all types of strong feelings yet oddly you have to live your life alongside that.
Because when you realize your time is getting shorter but at the same time feel sympathy for those that have passed it’s a strange mixture of feelings.
Still, you must get on with things.
And when you do you have to learn what you can and allow your survival instincts to dictate your life from there on in.
So what can you learn?
Well, you need to try and see how the person who has passed had seen things throughout their lifetime. Because that’s how they lived it when they had their piece of time. And if you can start to imagine how the departed person saw things and judged their decisions you`ll begin to understand them a lot more.
Because most people live as they die.
They live with that survival instinct central to their plan. And they die fighting for their last breath even though many know living that little bit longer probably won’t benefit them too much as they may be too diseased and it will eventually end their lives anyway.
But by delving into a person’s past and learning a lot more about them than what you already knew you`ll begin to peel back that layers of their life so you can see things as they did.
For example, if they died when they were older you won’t have been aware of their middle age or even their youth. If you first got to know them in middle age you won’t have known them when they were a child.
But it’s not only the other decades you will learn more about when a person dies but it’s the other areas of their life that you didn’t know about.
If the person you know was a work colleague you probably weren’t too aware of their home life. If you knew them as a neighbor you may have known them because of local and common issues of where you both live. But you won’t have known their work too well.
Or if you knew them from their hobbies you probably wouldn’t have known their family too well.
So in reality we only knew a certain part of a person within the time frame we knew them.
But death reveals their whole person.
That’s why although it’s a troubling time for all those people who are around a person who passes it’s also a wonderful lesson of how to survive. By getting to know them by their back story you can see how they plotted and planned to get from one step to another.
Because throughout life we are all looking for the same things.
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