Real Champions Learn From Losing

To maximize the number of times you’ll succeed in life you have to open your mind to learning because that's where the key to success lies

Dr. Conor Hogan Ph.D.
5 min readMay 15, 2021

Winning is the best way to have a winner’s attitude.

People think that winning can be switched on and you can perform to the highest level when you want to but this is not always possible.

Don’t get me wrong some performers can but many can’t.

Because many people get affected by losing. As losing brings a lot of problems with it. And those problems need to be sorted through before you can expect to regularly win again.

It’s the same for elite sportspeople, musicians, comedians, speakers, leaders, and many other performers.

Losing brings a terrible feeling especially if you consider yourself a competitor in life. And if you’re used to winning and then lose it can be the hardest pill to swallow. Many people who win regularly often say they are a bad loser simply because they can’t accept defeat.

But there’s something special about being a loser.

Photo by Alexander Schimmeck on Unsplash

Being a loser is only about missing out on winning. And you can miss out on winning by an inch or by a mile. No matter what you do when it happens you’ll still be a loser at that time.

Yet losing can make you a better or more regular winner in the future if you learn from losing.

Because champions who lose know their worth.

They realize all the talent they have and the hard work that they’ve put into winning.

That’s why winning is such a special feeling.

And when you win you feel as if you’re going to be the champion for a long time to come. You feel as if you’re at the top of your game and that you’re at your rightful place in your sport, or your industry. Yet it often doesn’t last.

Because unless you learn a lot from your defeats in life you won’t know what to do when your winning streak comes under challenge.

No one likes to lose but it happens from time to time. And when it does you need to know how to get back to winning as soon as possible. When you have learned from losing at other times then you can tap into those experiences and this helps you figure out what to do next to get back to a winning way.

And the more you analyze your loss the more chance you’re giving yourself to be a more regular winner in the future.

Photo by Vince Fleming on Unsplash

Even though it’s emotionally challenging to start picking part a defeat it’s going to benefit you in the long run. And when you start looking into the reasons why you underperformed you’ll begin to accept that you need to change some of the things you did. That’s hard for many to do because no one wants to admit they were at fault and their defeat was simply down to hard luck.

But in coming second it is always because the person, performer, or team ahead of you were better than you were on a given day.

Photo by Dmitry Ratushny on Unsplash

So you have to look at how they performed and managed the contest or performance better than you did.

And the first way to do all of this is to accept that being upset is a natural reaction to loss.

For example, once the final whistle goes in a sporting contest you’ll see players fall on the field if they’ve lost. That’s the worst feeling that arises momentarily even though a few seconds earlier the athlete was charged for competition and pushing themselves to their limits.

At that stage, many players will get so upset that they don’t want to face analyzing their defeat at that stage and that’s a wise thing to do.

Because at that early stage they need to feel and go through the experience of how deep that bad feeling goes. Yet throughout that initial period of losing it’s important to recognize your instinctive feelings towards why you have lost.

Once you’ve gotten over the first few days after a defeat it’s then time to open out the feelings of disappointment and try to observe why they made you feel so upset after losing.

That’s when you need to start putting labels and key reasons attached to your feelings. One way of doing this is to take a pen and paper out and write down the instinctive reasons you felt as soon as you first realized that you had lost. These reasons may prove to be illogical but unless you list them off and analyze them you’ll never know.

And once you start using the rational part of your brain you’ll begin to understand if your initial responses to defeat were logical or not.

Usually, some of your instinctive feelings will be proved to be correct. And once you admit that to yourself then you’ll begin to turn a corner and go to the next stage of getting over the defeat. And that can be a very progressive step that enables you to plan better for a future victory.

But your instinctive feelings of loss may not always be proven as being rational.

And when you analyze them logically you can begin to dump that initial feeling for losing. Then you begin to feel lighter and more distant from being a loser.

That’s when you start to see more clearly and begin to realize your new confidence to compete contains wisdom that will make you a stronger winner.

And that will mean you’re harder to defeat in the future.

Get FREE Access To Dr. Conor’s VIP List Here (Limited Time Only)

--

--

Dr. Conor Hogan Ph.D.

Forbes, INC. & Entrepreneur Magazines, CBS, & NBC Featured, Dr. Conor Is The No. 1 Best Selling Author of The Gym Upstairs