Why You Were Born To Be A Commited Human Being

No matter what you do in life you`ll need to show commitment to the cause and when you do all else will work itself out for the better

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The good die young and the married die old.

No, it’s not a common saying but it’s something I`m considering to coin as my own phrase.


Well, following a recent conversation about the power of commitment it made me think of an interesting study that I once read about.

The study found that when threatened with a mildly painful electric shock, married women had a decreased brain response to this threat if they were holding their husband’s hands. Yet, single people and ones who had romantic partners in the study but were not legally married had a more increased brain response to the mild electric shock.

The findings revealed that parts of the brain are less reactive to stress when someone is with a person they consider themselves married to.

When I first read about the study I too was shocked but it was a different kind of shock.

As at that time I was single and was in no way close to having a romantic marriage. Yet at the time, it made me think about how if my personal life didn’t change then my long-term health was going to suffer. But then, I brushed that momentary notion off and got on with things as a happy bachelor!

Still, since my recent conversation where this topic came up, I`ve started thinking about what great power there is in showing commitment in life. And I feel now that as humans we crave it.

And although we may be committed to the wrong person or cause, we still seek to be aligned to someone or something all the same. If you don’t believe me then let’s look at it from a three-pronged approach.

1. Everyone relates to someone else.

No matter who you are you have a relationship in life right now or you`ve had one in the past. In fact, I`d go so far as to say if you`re able to read this piece of writing then you’re old enough to know what a relationship with another person requires.

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Of course, this doesn’t have to be a romantic one though.

For if you have a parent, a sibling, a friend, or a colleague then these are all relationships in your life. And if you are aware of these people then you relate to them in some way and they to you. So you`ll know when you need them and how you wish to be treated well by them as well.

Because from those relationships you`ll realize that you want commitment and you’ll want it before you can build trust with those people over time. As that’s also how those people you relate to will judge you as a character.

Else why would they demand your commitment to them?

And if you do decide to commit to a longer-term romantic relationship and marry that other person your commitment to the cause will be judged straightway when you and your partner will have to sign a legal contract of marriage. Now although there are many instances of separation and divorce from marriage, it’s rare that you see two people who are about to sign their marriage contract without a smile too far from their face.

Because they know that they need to commit to someone or something at some stage or another in their lives.

But if you`re not the marrying type then don’t worry but know that commitment will be expected of you in other areas of life if you have the ability to wiggle yourself clear of a lifetime of being married to one other person.

2. As that’s how the world of work works.

For if you find yourself in a job and you work hard enough to gain a better wage or salary then your commitment to the cause will be recognized in some way or another. As people who work for the government or civil services around the world are given carrots to earn permanent and pensionable rewards for being committed to the cause. Of course, they may not be paid extremely well but this is factored off against rewarding the employee with a type of regular payment when it’s time for them to retire.

But if you`re not an employee and instead you go the entrepreneurial route your freedom of work will still demand commitment.

Photo by Ant Rozetsky on Unsplash

Because there you’ll run into the need to sign contracts.

Now you may have to sign for several years or for even longer but either way, you will have to sign something.

And it doesn’t stop there.

3. No matter who or what you work at you`ll still need a place to live.

And when you find it you`ll realize that place will either be rented or owned by you. Either way, you`ll have to pay for the forthcoming use of the property through rent, a mortgage, or taxes.

So no matter where you go, who you meet, or what you do in life commitment is inevitable.

And the reality is to succeed at anything you need to have a commitment to it and that involves having a personal promise that combines loyalty, consistency, a persistence of approach, and action, all wrapped around an initially focused choice.

Photo by Beth Macdonald on Unsplash

So when your youth passes don’t be too put out because if marriage doesn’t come your way know that there are others in your life who`ll demand your time, money, and energy, and when they do know you are born to take on that responsibility.

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Dr. Conor Hogan Ph.D.

Dr. Conor Hogan Ph.D.

Forbes, INC. & Entrepreneur Magazines, CBS, & NBC Featured, Dr. Conor Is The World’s Leading High-Performance Neuro Socio-Psychologist & Co-Authored 4 Books

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